arboretics:

aeraspais replied to your post: Ugh can we all just accept that our ideas about…

But, there’s a significant difference between getting spanked with a spoon, which I have been on the receiving end of, and shooting a child’s laptop. Like, I think it is a little more than just a parenting debate.

i don’t want to engage in this debate much further because i don’t find it productive to just argue over something people are not going to change their minds over but i want to be clear: that dad crossed a line with the gun. bringing a lethal weapon into this was in no way acceptable. i think that is agreed-upon, and i don’t think sam was saying that, either. actually she did say that she was not ok with the gun. but what made me uncomfortable with the argument is that i see why a certain kind of upbringing can lead you to believe that destroying the property you purchased for your child constitutes a “lesson”. and i think that shutting down that conversation—ignoring a person’s cultural background and telling them to ‘just stop’—it just seems condescending to me. maybe that’s not what was intended but it is how it seemed. imo.

i am not trying to start an argument of any kind and arguments on my dash make me really uncomfortable!! (conflict-avoiding infp) i’m just saying.

This whole discussion is about this one guy and what he did. @morethanlost was generalising the discussion to defend that guy and I told @morethanlost to “just stop” because generalising the discussion is apologising for that behaviour which you and apparently she both agree is not okay. Acting like it was originally a generalised discussion about parenting rather than a discussion about this one specific guy is really disingenuous and it removes the focus from what he actually did and how it was not okay. And it does constitute apologetics. To say “Well, bringing a gun to a facebook status update fight might have been a little excessive but parents are human” is apologetics and that’s what I told @morethanlost to stop with — and to be honest, as a victim of domestic abuse, I can’t believe you pulled the tone argument on me.

And, with that, I’m out.